Mother's Day Kisses from the King

Oh wow...there are times when I sit in awe of how much God cares for me.

Two years ago I attended a Beth Moore simulcast where she spoke on the parable of the sower. Most of us are familiar with this parable about the four different types of soil. I believe that each of us at different times in our lives are all these different types of soil. I'm not sure how to put all this into words so I'm going to start with the history and work to present hoping that along the way I am able to express how awesome our God is and how if we are paying attention and fully engaged in our walk with him he will give us sweet kisses to let us know just how much he loves us and that his beauty is woven into our story. Without him my story would not be beautiful.

OK, so back to the simulcast. Here is my journal entry immediately after. (This was August, 2008 so I was 7 months pregnant with Rylee--just to give you a time reference)

You are an awesome God w/ awesome ways--I am so uncreative next to you even though I continue to try to create my own story instead of allowing you to author each day w/out my lousy input.

Lord--I am so thrilled that I was able to attend the Beth Moore Conference this weekend and I'm holding my hand over my heart to protect the words you spoke to me. I pray that my soil of my life is good for the harvest. But not my harvest--your intended harvest--100 fold.

Write on my heart the seven action steps given this weekend.

1. Treasure the wonder--oh how I need to do this. Continue to create a hunger in my heart for your word.

2. Protect my heart from evil prey--I will guard my heart and not allow Satan to pluck the seeds you have planted for me.

3. Expect the test--The test gets me--Lord teach me to expect it and be prepared--no more pop quizzes!

4. Dig the roots--I am so thankful you have been revealing your love to me--I long for my roots to be deeper.

5. Stop the choke--Man does this get me. I often get distracted by the worries of life. I want to surrender that anxiety and mistrust back to you.

6. Retain the word--Boy does this go back to the basics and still so hard for me to do. Give me the drive, the will & the discipline.

7. Press forth to my 100-fold. Lay on my heart what that is at this point in time so that I might not give up & quit in the middle but press forward.

I honestly think if I went back through each of these action steps I could tie it into my story of miscarriage. But the thing that has me all excited about my God tonight is the idea of protecting my heart from evil prey. Beth gave a great picture of us literally holding our hand over our heart and telling Satan "I received a word from the God of the universe and you will not take that away from me." It was a powerful word and I have thought of that many times in the last two years. Through out that weekend the theme song was Revelation Song. We sang it over and over again. It became my new song with God. (I think I've talked before about having a "song" at different points in my life that speaks deep to my heart and ties my life directly to my worship--not sure that makes sense....it became a meaningful song to me...maybe I should leave it at that) ANYWAY...when I hear that song I am reminded of the message to hold my hand over my heart so that no one can snatch what God has placed in my heart.

So why am I talking about 2 years ago? Well, a couple of weeks ago I spoke at the women's luncheon at our church. I shared my story and shared a small part of what God has shown me in these past several months. As I drove to the church I was thinking about what I was going to share and I began to feel the uncertainty of what I was about to share and how it would be received. I began to think of the opposition that I might meet. At that moment I turned on the radio hoping to get in at least one good worship song before I arrived at the church. God being God gave me Revelation Song. The song that reminded me of exactly what I needed to be reminded of at that moment in time. It was time for me to put my hand over my heart and tell Satan he would NOT take away from me what the Lord himself had given me.

Last night I posted the story of David loosing his infant and his response to go the house of the Lord and worship. This morning I went to the house of the Lord to worship. I thought a lot today about the babies I have in heaven. I am their mommy too--I love them. Someday I will be with them. God has assured me over and over that those babies are safe in his arms. This morning in the midst of worship God himself bent down and gave me the sweetest mother's day gift of our song...Revelation Song. Yes, I was able to worship Jesus knowing that he is worthy. Knowing that He was and is and is to come. Knowing that He is my everything, and I will adore Him. He is who he says he is. He is truth. And since all that is true, one day I will be with him face to face and be reunited with my babies.

By the way...I won't go into much detail but for the sake of remembering just how good God is, I did meet some opposition that day. I was challenged. And at that moment I held my hand over my heart and said, "Nice try Satan but you can't take this from me. Two years ago God's word was planted on good soil, it has taken deep root in me and I know how to protect what God has spoken to me because I know it is from the Lord himself."

What a great mother's day! What a great God!